Samuel Yeoh

The past few days have been quite emo for me. I nearly broke down a few times doing almost nothing at all, like wiping cutlery or arranging menus. It’s funny what the mind does when you have too much time to think, and too little things to occupy yourself with.

A lot of thoughts have been running through my head, why I am where I am now, and where I want to be headed. And watching all those people coming in and out of the coffee outlet can set some really unhealthy thoughts for the hyperactive mind. In that mess of nameless faces and uncountable futures, I find myself searching, thrashing around for some sort of meaning. Meaning to their lives, and meaning to mine.

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Recently, I’ve moved out of the travel industry to the non-travelling industry – bumming. Yes, I quit my day job. To kill time though, I decided to take up a part-time waitering job at one of the local coffee outlets.

Waitering has always been one of those curious holiday jobs I’ve wanted to try, and they are a great place to see lots of fun things for a person like me. Just a day on the floor can yield a lot of interesting story ideas and fantasies, more than enough to fill a few posts, but I digress.

Today though, I got tipped for the first time. Unexpectedly too!

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Alright! Website’s been finally revamped, with 3 sub-sections now. Check it out!

Was just looking through my old archives to dig for photos for a website revamp, and gawd, I can’t believe the number of photo-crimes I’ve committed!

Full albums of unusable photos, atrocities I can’t believe I’ve sent to people at one point of time. It’s amazing, really.

Looking back, I’ve come a long way. I’d like to think I don’t commit such crimes anymore, but unfortunately my recent experiences suggest otherwise. Oh well, at least nowadays I do generate at least one keeper per

Sigh. Seems like things blow up when you least expect it.

I should have seen it coming, and was in fact planning to take reconciliatory steps already, but it exploded before I could find time to do anything.

Have been getting quite a lot of bad rep recently, as I’ve been taking awhile to edit my photos, and do owe a backlog to a number of models. In all fairness and honesty, I am delaying quite a bit beyond my usual 2 week deadline, but at the same time I always try to give some preview photos within the deadline. So it kinda irks and disappoints me when a model complained that she waited over a month to get only 5 photos.

Don’t get me wrong, she has every right to complain, I’m guilty about the delay as charged. But it’s the way how one-sided it all is. I did give 5 photos within 2 weeks, and another 19 photos a few weeks later. Slow, but still different from claiming that I didn’t deliver. What irks me more are the other complains which are also skewed and factually incorrect, but I digress. There’s no point bringing out evidence to debate on petty matters, I just needed to rant.

To be honest, I have no idea how to deal with this. It’s the first time I’ve encountered such a situation in all my years of shooting, and I’m not a very PR person. Despite the injustice I feel, I guess it’s best to just ignore and let others chatter away. Ultimately, those who feel my work are of value and want to work with me will still approach me, and it filters out the bad eggs.

Anyway, to top things off, I’m about to become a jobless bum. Talk about double whammy.

Been having difficulties with my work for the past few months, part of the reason why I’ve been stalling the editing of my photos. (Yeah, I still shoot, coz it helps me destress. So the backlog is still self-inflicted, no excuses for that.) Today it finally culminated in a chat with the bosses, and an agreement that we should part ways amicably.

Actually, I should be happy, coz I’ve been planning to quit and start my own business already. Just didn’t expect to have a shift in plans so quickly.

All in all, it’s a pretty shitty day.

Along my journey as a photographer, there’s nothing more heartwarming than a praise or comment on my photos. It serves as a nice note to let me know I’m going somewhere, and of course it’s also a lovely ego boost!

Recently, I’ve been shooting a lot more sensual black and whites, in a bid to develop more useful portfolio for the direction I’m heading. The good thing about black and whites is that they are a lot easier to manage and control, since there’s no worry about colours, just adjusting the contrast. 

My usual habit is to put some of my works up on my MSN display picture. To my surprise and utter delight, the recent images have been evoking positive responses from a number of female acquaintances. When two of them express interest to be photographed by me, and one of them actually cancels a holiday trip for it, I can’t help but beam with pride.

Seriously though, I’m still far from good. But at least now I’m good enough to be appreciated by a few people. Hopefully in time, this appreciation will grow, and I’ll actually become good enough to do this full time!

Yes, if you can’t tell by now, this is a self-serving, head-expanding, ego-stroking post! Hahahahaha.