Samuel Yeoh

Continued from here.

Read the rest…

“Happy birthday, kiddo.”

The lights went out, and a soft music flooded the room. Out from the dark floated a silhoutte and three glowing lights. The three flames belonged to two larger candles and a smaller one, arranged in a perfect triangle on the cake, representing the years that had passed.

“What will you wish for?”

Courage and strength. From a spineless boy to a man with courage and strength. Courage to find my way, and strength to overcome the obstacles that litter it. I took a deep breathe, and blew as hard as I could.

Happy 21st. Finally.

Thanks for remembering, cousin.

Had a little surprise today.

It’s been a long while since I was active in my forum, and we had a little meetup cum forum t-shirt collection today. Turns out, Cube, the forum admin, graciously sponsored the tees for all ‘staff’ members, ie. us forum mods. Hey man, no complains there. A pleasant surprise indeed, and prolly the only Christmas present I’ll be getting this year as well. (The rest usually come in dollar signs.) Thanks for the shirt man, haha.

Dri-fit polo tee. Don’t usually like polo tees, but since it’s dri-fit… Hmm…

Forum nick.

Now that makes two forum tees that I have. Haven’t worn my FG one in ages though. It’s a hot non dri-fit polo tee. What’s with old men and polo tees. (No no, not me. Seems like the forum admins who are working men always prefer polos.)

Phew. Been editing all morning, and my photos are really too terrible to do this commercially. But then again, someone said that sometimes, we just have to take the plunge. Think about the consequences later. Nonetheless, taking a break now, and I really wanted to write about this sooner, but was busy/distracted.

Was at a friend’s advance 21st birthday celebration, and to be honest, it was quite a conflicted feeling. For one, up till today, I still have no idea why I’m there, if I should be there, and if I was meant to be there. It’s just heartbreaking to be treated so… important… but wonder if you really are, or that’s just the way everyone’s treated.

But, it was nice. I always enjoy a cosy and heartwarming party. It’s nice to bask in all that love and affection going around. To quote someone, it’s just so… ‘wholesome’. Haha. Actually, almost a little too wholesome that I felt somewhat uncomfortable. It’s one thing to watch from a distance and smile at all the magical moments, it’s another to be pulled in for a while and told nice but uncomfortable things.

Thanks anyway, it was sweet. Just that I’m not sure I know how to react, coz I dunno how much it really means to you. Call me a pessimist, but you’re one good thing that happened that I still don’t quite know to believe in or not. When you come back from China six months later, maybe we’ll know better. Or maybe I’ll know better.

But I guess anytime you need me, I’ll be hanging around, even if things change. I’m always hanging around anyway, not just for you, but for the rest of you.

Now that mine is coming soon, I’m not sure I know what I wanna do. Hahaha. Probably I’ll treat myself to something posh. Watch a movie, have a good expensive dinner, and spend the night enjoying Christmas and New Year decorations, and the general end of year mood of people walking by. So movie-ish.

All I want this year, is to be contented. To have a beautiful piece in time to forever keep. And perhaps, a promise of some things to never change, some things to never cool, and some things to never forget.

Anyone wanna sit on a park bench with me till morning, watching people go by?